How Talk Therapy Helps to Cope with Stress

We are proud to offer this inspirational contribution from Saamia Khalid. Check out her bio at the end of the article!

Stress is a common experience in our daily lives. If we don’t learn to cope with everyday stress, it may
turn into severe clinical depression. Medication is not always the final solution, when there are so many natural and organic methods we can use to deal with stress. Talk Therapy is one of the healthiest ways. In this article, we will see in detail how it helps us to overcome stress and nourish our mental health.

Talk therapy, also known as psychotherapy in clinical terms, is the treatment of a mental illness by
psychological rather than medical means.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectic Behavioral Therapy (DBT) help us identify our abnormal thoughts, replace those with healthier ones, and deal with everyday emotional reactions.

My friend, Hannah, is one of the strongest people I know. She suffered mild to severe depression and
turned out to be the most beautiful version of herself.

When I first met with Hannah, she was so full of life. It was over a period of two consecutive years that she happened to have multiple unfortunate events. In 2011, she lost her father in a car accident. That time was crucial for her academic career since she had to appear in the final professional examination.

The sudden death of father severely impacted her ability to prepare well for the exams. However, she took the examination, but could not manage to pass it. The thing which really inspired me about her was she did not lose hope, and continued to try the following year. But another failure was waiting for her. She failed a second time as well.

That was when something about Hannah changed. That self-confident girl, who, would often times encourage others to do their best, became a frightened soul.

After enduring the heartache of her fathers death, and then being unable to pass the examinations, Hannah decided to quit her studies all together. When I came to know about her decision, I was almost shocked. She was one of the brightest students among the entire college. I could not except her decision. I talked to her about this. We kept on discussing it for a week. But she was too hopeless to continue. Fortunately, I did not give up on her potential, so I went to see our psychology professor to ask for his advice. In fact we we both went to him, and he suggested Talk Therapy.

When do we need Talk Therapy?

Hannah was doubtful that she really needed talk therapy. We came to the conclusion that every now and then, when we feel the need to talk with someone who is professionally trained, we can just talk about the things that bother us. We need to process what we are feeling.

We tend to feel sad at unexpected moments.

At times, we feel clouds of sadness overcasting the sky of our life. We get tearful and cry for no reason. When we are emotionally full, our body and mind requires processing of our feelings.

For example, you could be reading something in a magazine or watching anything on social media and feel overwhelmed. You don’t have any way to stop being sad. It is one of the very first signs that we need someone to talk about what is going inside us.

We find ourselves thinking negatively.

Often times we may find ourselves just shutting down with the sheer negativity going inside us.
We gradually begin to feel bad about ourselves, and the things we loved.

For example, you begin to think that everyone around you is doing so well in life, but you are a complete failure. This is another sign that you need to fight and break the negative thought process.

 

We slip back into unhealthy habits.

We may fall into our old bad habits, if not controlled properly. This could be eating disorder thoughts
with more frequency or doing small things that may not seem like a big deal. This could be self-injury or desire to drink more or use drugs, especially if you were an addict before.

Whatever it is, if we find those unhealthy habits creeping back in, we immediately need to reach out for help, talk about our desires, and get back on track as soon as possible.

We feel our emotions bursting.

We feel like our emotions are running us versus us controlling our actions and reactions. This usually presents with angry outbursts. If you find yourself becoming easily upset and not being able to control your anger, this could be another sign that you just need someone to identify the trigger that’s causing harm to you.

We have suicidal thoughts.

Any failure in our academic or professional life may make us so demoralized that we could end up
having suicidal thoughts. If we face these frequently, it is a sign that we are having hard time with
ourselves.

If we feel so hopeless that we consider death as an option, we need to talk to someone about it and sooner rather than later. Even though it feels like there is no way out of this dark hole, talking to someone about it and just having that little, teeny glimmer of hope can keep us going forward.

How does talk therapy work for PTSD (Post-traumatic stress disorder)?

While going in depth of Hannah’s case, we came to realize that she had Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. The sudden death of her father and continuous dropping grades in academics triggered her mental illness. The lasting consequences of these distressing events turned out to be terrifying.

Talk Therapy can help with PTSD in a sense that it helps us understand the process our body is going
through. It provides a chance for us to explore our feelings and the way they affect our behavior and
attitude in life.

The Trauma-Focused Talk Therapy

It involves exploring in depth the details of the trauma that has been experienced. We go through a step by step process in our disturbing emotions and thoughts.

We can talk to anyone we confide in. It does not necessarily need to be a qualified therapist. Just talking to take our feelings out in front of someone helps us. It needs to be carried out at a pace that is comfortable, in a way that nourishes the tangled thoughts in our mind. It aims to build better coping strategies to recover.

Why should we talk about our feelings?

Most of the problems in our life require more moral support than practical help. Sometimes we just
need someone to look at our situation from a different perspective and guide us.
A new or outside point of view on our problems helps us see the greener side of grass. We not only clear our own mind, but also learn to prevent worsening depression.

Communicating about things is the best way to get out of these. It is a highly effective way to heal over
the negative experiences in all circumstances. Talking helps us clarify our future goals and helps us know exactly what we want. It also calms our unnecessary tension and anxiety for ourselves.

The processing of post-traumatic events through deep conversations gives our fears a shape to fight
with. The more we talk, the more our fears fade away. Verbal expression of our inner feelings also helps to resolve personal relationship conflicts. Discussing our problems with our loved ones makes these less upsetting.

How talking with Family and Friends helps?

Can you imagine living without any sincere person in your life? Hanging out with friends is a relieving time we always cherish. Our best friends are the people we count on to provide support whenever needed. They prevent loneliness and accompany you. As it is said; Sometimes talking to your best friend is all the therapy you need. Have you ever noticed sharing your problems with your close ones always relaxes you mentally to a large extent?

The circle of people we keep in our life is really important. The sincere people around us keep us
engaged in conversations. The ear-splitting laughter is the best remedy to any stress.
It is extremely difficult, and almost impossible, to feel relaxed without a strong supportive environment. We need some people who are always there to offer assistance.

People who stay connected with family and friends live with longevity as explained by a study of
Brigham Young University and the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill researchers.
People who spend more time with family certainly add to their years. It also lowers the risk of behavioral problems, and boosts self-confidence and self-esteem.

Talking while Eating Together

Dinner hours are the amazing time to spend with our family and have a brief discussion about various
topics. At night time, you don’t have to rush off for your work or play. Just sitting around a table, sharing our whole day activities allows us to release stress levels by having an engaging and heartfelt conversation.

 

Who is the Right Person to Talk with?

This is the most essential thing you need to consider when you are to vent out to someone. The person
you’re thinking to talk with must be sincere to you. You both should be comfortable enough with each other to talk openly about your issues. Understanding is the key, and confidentiality is crucial.

Finding the right person for your Talk Therapy is a necessary. You have to establish a trustworthy
connection with him/her so that you feel comfortable while explaining your whole story.

If you’re paying cash for a licensed professional therapist, it is mandatory to make sure that the
therapist holds a current license and is in good standing with the state regulatory board. Also, you should look for a therapist who is experienced in treating the particular problems that you have, because a therapist always has special areas of focus, such as depression, eating disorders, coping with stress, dealing with your negative thoughts, etc.

Why Talk Therapy is the best way to get strong?

Talking is an empowering experience. It does not come with ease always, but it is definitely worth it and rewarding at the end. It usually takes multiple sessions and quality time.

Nothing changes until we are able to control our mind. Talk Therapy considers how negative thoughts
are destroying our inner peace, and turns those into a positive mindset.

Medication may make us feel relieved about particular physical symptoms, but it does not fix our mental confusions. It can’t help us to figure out our feelings to get out of it. Talk Therapy can be challenging, as confining emotions and thoughts repeatedly arise during the whole
process. However, it ensures long-lasting benefits beyond symptom relief. It transforms our life—for relating better to others, building a character that we want, and coping with stress and whatever obstacles are thrown on the way. It allows to openly talk about anything without fear of repercussions. It gives concrete goals to work toward. It helps to turn fear into hope. It took Hannah only two months to get over her negative thoughts about herself. She focused on her future self, and talked about each painful experience she went through to heal from it.

 

Final Thought

When you struggle with mental illness in the form of mild to moderate stress or depression, just know
that a catharsis of your feelings can make you feel better. Talk Therapy teaches you how to change the pattern of toxic thinking. It works with anti-depressants to
pull you out of the pit you are burying in yourself. You get to know that you are not alone, and this too shall pass. Sharing the burden of emotions improves your physical health as well.
It is not a magic fix-all, but is also not a passive experience either. It is not an embarrassment and it does not make you seem weak at all.

 

 Saamia Khalid is currently an MBBS student. As a freelance writer, she enjoys writing medical and scientific articles and blog posts. Besides writing, she loves to learn new skills from YouTube, while focusing on her clinical practice as well.
Feel free to contact her at saamiakhalid@gmail.com.